I just really can't believe the test group is coming to end (tear). Well it has truly been an amazing journey, although the test group is ending my journey will still continue. You all are truly amazing and inspiring!!! I love the positive energy that you all bring each and everyday to class. I feel blessed to have meet you all!
There have been times when I was ready to throw in the towel, because be I was seeing huge results. It's been a constant struggle really, especially these past 2 weeks. There have been a lot of changes at my job and the changes have been stressful, and my body has been feeling the stress. There are also times when I truly love what I'm seeing in the mirror and then there are times when I truly look at myself with disgust, and I say this because my mind is playing tricks on me. I know I've been saying this a lot change starts from within, so that it may reflect on the outside, but it hasn't been easy. I know and I learning or at least trying to learn to love me for me and that results will happen, but I need to practice patience and take a step back and see where I can fix or modify something so that I can really achieve my goals.
BODY: Although I'm not seeing the drastic changes that I was hoping for, I know that my body does feel different. It's stronger that before, my endurance is getting better. I'm feeling more energetic and a bit more happier that before. What I do know is that my body is feeling the stress, and these past 2 weeks I've been so tempted on snacking on candy. See that's how I cope with stress, I tend to eat more sweets, drink more soda, eat more junk food. I failed a few times cause I would go buy a cookie and eat it to feel better, but instead of makin me feel better it made me feel worse. I'm also having trouble sleeping, lately I've become an insomniac, and believe me I WANT to SLEEP, but I can't seem to do it. It's frustrating cause when I finally fall asleep 2 or 3 hrs later I have to wake up and I go the rest of the day feeling very sluggish.
LEARNING: I am learning to each and everyday to love myself and accept me for who I am, it's easier said than done, but I trust that I will no longer hate me. I know that I will acheive my goals, it's going to take time, but it's ok cause all I have is TIME.
OBSERVATION: Who would've thought that I would ever run 5 miles, No one!!. But I did it along with my partner and crime. Let me tell you running is an amazing experience, while you run you get to clear your mind and start putting things into perspective. Now this is all coming from a girl who never in her life ever thought of running, but it became possible, I LOVE LOVE TO RUN!!! So far, this year I have ran so far 3 races, I have 4 more to go to end the year, can I do it? I SURE CAN!!
GOALS: Like each and everyday, I have to push push push. I have to also keep in my mind to keep my form right, that this isn't a competition. I will not let work stress me out, because it's putting my body thru torture. I will also try to get a good night's rest because I hate feeling sluggish throught the whole day.
Mariela,
ReplyDeletetime is our friend and our biggest foe sometimes. But having an idea of the BIG PICTURE (the healthy lifestlye, being confident in your own skin, and passing onto others the love of fitness) that helps us to get through the day to day struggles. You are right change happens from within and you have everything you need to continue this journey so don't give up. It is the small, simple things compounded over time that bring us our biggest dreams. Thanks for sharing all of this.
I think it's time for a change with goals. Rather than just lose the weight (because that will happen and when it does...then what?), why not just be healthy. Everything else will fall into place after that. Make more specific goals and include running in them! Like take a Chi Running course!!! ;) Also, on the insomnia. Did I mention that in your 30's you start to suffer from insomnia bouts? It happens...starts from 31-33 then again in the late 30's. I notice that as we get older we sometimes need less sleep especially if we remain healthy. Also, stress levels rise during the 3rd decade so it's not uncommon for the insomnia to be stress related. Continue to eat healthy and exercise. That will at least keep your body in shape and able to deal with the stress. And for the Yoga tape....http://amzn.com/B0001WTWYC
ReplyDeleteThis is a great beginners DVD. Bryan Kest.